Oh, how far we've come, my dear fellow millennials. We started from the humble beginnings of hard, laborious jobs like "being a kid" and "sitting through school". Now, we've climaxed at the notorious, dare I say it, avocado toast economy. Quite a ride, I must say, but not the pleasant roller coaster kind. More like a nosedive, if anything.
The Absurdity of Avocado Toast Economics
Now, what is this avocado toast business all about? To put it simply, it's a $6 piece of morning glory smeared on a $1 slice of rustic sourdough that will magically dwindle your bank account faster than you can say, “Hold the red pepper flakes”. It's kind of like a great magic show, where you applaud as your money disappears, except the magician is a trendy café, and you are left with an Instagram story and an overpriced snack.
The matrix of economics is a dreadfully complicated subject that many would rather skip, much like a broccoli. It's too hard, it's too green! Well, that's me quoting my co-eater, not Adam Smith. But there's got to be something we're missing here. Why is avocado toast so expensive?
For one, it's not just the avocado or the toast that you're paying for. It's the painstaking labor of someone scooping out a ripe avo at just the right time and slathering it on a piece of toasted bread. Or so, that's what they want you to believe. It's also the pleasure of partaking in a social trend, elevating your social stature by multiple folds, just by posting a picture of your brunch. Bravo! Your debt just got a lot more likes and shares!
The Satire of The Avocado Toast Generation: Mass Bankruptcy Alert?
It's funny really. We have come to be known as the avocado toast generation. It's as if we ceremoniously replace our cereals with sliced greens in some sacred morning ritual. Misers might argue we could've saved hundreds, if not thousands of dollars over the years by simply substituting the avos and toast with the humble peanut butter and jelly. Oh, you misers. You have no understanding of the avocado sacrifice that goes into maintaining hipster millennial status.
We might as well turn our savings into green pulp and spread it on our mortgages because, let's face it, who needs real estate when you've got avocado toast? The sheer satire of it all is that despite the avocado toast economy literally leading us towards a financial exodus, we, millennials are still willing to pledge our loyalties to it. And why wouldn't we? The taste of bankruptcy has never been so delicious!
It is evident that this "Avocado Toast Economy" has surged in popularity among the modern, hip, and essentially sucker-for-aesthetics youth. However, the real crux of this story isn't about our beloved millennials making an unfortunate quicksand pit out of smashed avocados on overpriced rustic bread. It’s about the entire economy being flipped on its head so that a handful of fruits, previously regarded as mere fillers in a guacamole recipe, could single-handedly send an entire generation plummeting into bankruptcy!
The Surprising Epicenter of the Millennial Economy
This phenomenon inexplicably accelerated post Instagram's peak popularity phase. Bloggers, lifestyle gurus, pseudo-nutritionists - everyone jumped on the bandwagon with their exotic avocado toast versions. Emblazoned with a smattering of exotic seeds and a rainbow of edible flowers, these exorbitant green toast slabs have now become the Holy Grail of millennial sustenance.
The question, however, remains: How did we get here? A rewind to about five years ago suggests a rather different picture. Avocados, although familiar, were not the 'IT' food. Deemed heavy on the stomach (and wallet), their consumption was restricted to salads, guacamole, and the occasional sandwich spread.
The Power of Perception
Enter influencers and the power of perception. Overused avocado metaphors about finding the perfect partner (because it's as tough as being lucky enough to slice open an avocado which is perfectly ripe) started becoming a regular on social media. Avocado toast was portrayed as the quintessential breakfast of champions; the magic potion for that lustrous skin; the elixir of everlasting youth.
A Tipping Point with Toast
Suddenly, the humble avocado patched up with the voguish sourdough, sprinkled with some pseudo-scientific health jargon, and lo! The most coveted toast popped out of the global economy’s toaster. ‘Avo-on-toast’ was now a mood, a lifestyle statement, a contention to reply back to the 'Ok Boomer' battalion.
Ever since the Avocado Toast Economy found its foothold, millennials worldwide have been willingly (may I add) hurling their hard-earned money down this perpetually hungry green pit, while Wall Street fiends nervously with trade balance sheets, and real estate brokers grumble about the slump in demand for affordable housing.
The Great Green Finish
In conclusion, while our millennials' affinity towards avocados may be understandable, their choices are inadvertently throwing the global economy off-balance, more than any geopolitical tension or trade war could. So, here's signing off with a toast to the 'Avocado Toast Economy,' which makes us chuckle, retweet, and of course, shell out a few extra greens. May the avocados be with you, always!